…part of me!

As a young student at the Uni, I have had the privilege of coming in contact with several brilliant and dedicated lecturers and students. Their passion, devotion and enthusiasm have certainly left a mark somewhere…it has become a…part of me!

There are several fellow travellers, friends, relations…that have added to the inner frequency by virtue of their sympathy or indifference, humility or arrogance, sense of composure or sheer desperation, honesty or deceit. Through years of association, reflection, assimilation and distillation…some fraction thereof has helped shape …part of me!

Long back I came across the book “How to make friends and influence people” by Dale Carnegie. The suggestions presented still make good sense and are acceptable. Few days back, I was slightly concerned to read some unfavourable comments about the book that has been around for some 70 years. In line with the prevailing social, economic and political environs, we do our bit to survive and thrive. We continue to fine tune our strategy and resolve. At a fundamental level only that ideology or habit works for me that is …part of me!

Release of Book !!

Pleased to share the release of book:          

In Search Of...: What's always there...Subtly                                        [Kindle Edition]

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SW7L1QK

Seeking your good wishes 

Book Description

It's a delight to see a seasoned artist perform. You can enjoy every move, absorb the rhythm and relate to the character. While I deeply value such artists, their genius, dedication and commitment, I know that this line is not ...my Call!

In the gentle footsteps of a child, in innocent gesture of a close one, in fine notes of a song, in tender move of a twig, in sweet stretch of a pet, in few challenging situations and sometimes in silence, I have heard ...my Call!

In words of Rabindranath Tagore “The blossom has not opened; only the wind is sighing by. I have not seen his face, nor have I listened to his voice; only I have heard his gentle footsteps from the road before my house. ”

Long back, I had the privilege of attending the music program of a Ghazal Master. During the performance, he briefly drifted into a sentimental patch, probably trying to share some of his inner pain. The audience was not impressed and made their point clear. What may appear as an ordinary observation at one stage, can serve as a pretty significant insight in another context, may be years later. At times, the imprints left within by several friends, relations and co-travellers, often just in the passing, help you decipher the passage for yourself, put the pieces together and assemble your own...scaffolding!

After fifteen years of a fine travel with our precious pet dog, we had to put him down recently due to rapidly deteriorating health. Picasso once said, of his favourite dog, "Lump, he’s not a dog, he’s not a little man, he’s somebody else". Often they add to your being... well beyond the...scaffolding!

This book is a humble attempt to…assemble and dismantle a scaffolding… listen to and share...my Call... probably ... “I have heard his gentle footsteps!”

... the point of acceptance!

We humans are gifted with many faculties that help us survive, explore, create new structures and perhaps concepts. On the flip side, our desires, drives, doubts...hold us back from...the point of acceptance!

 

Having dealt with several people and issues in varied contexts, it’s clear that beyond a thresh-hold, most of material, intellectual, social and cultural tags have little relevance to the...the point of acceptance!

 

Many years back, during an initial job interview, I was asked if I was a lazy person. It bothered me for quite some time. Gradually I was able to dust it aside and get to ...the point of acceptance!

 

There are several acquaintances, where we are at different platforms in terms of age, stage even orientation at times. Once there is some patch of common interest, similarity of views, an ounce of mutual affinity, and one is pretty close to...the point of acceptance!

 

Many years back, I realised that I can feel claustrophobic sitting in a corner next to the window in a plane. During a recent flight, just as we were about to take off, a lady asked me, if I could move from my aisle seat to the window seat, as she was claustrophobic! I did explain the situation to her and moved to the window seat just to challenge myself. It worked out just fine, helping me figure out... the point of acceptance!

...the Mantra!

Based on our nature, nurture, circumstances... we gradually figure out our formula to keep afloat... the Mantra!

How much importance we attach to an issue ... to our drive... to our values... point to... the Mantra!

For many years I have been having a glass of warm water with honey and lemon in the morning, as suggested by many for good health. Generally I am more comfortable in outdoors than indoors. Going for a walk stimulates me at many levels. For me it’s all part of... the Mantra!

A piece of music that stirs you, ... a story that inspires you...a dream that drives you... the resilience that sustains you... point to... the Mantra!

Gradually you come to realise that you are not far from ...the Mantra!

...the same source!

It’s fascinating to see the way our desires originate, shape up, find fulfilment & then gradually dissolve into...the same source!

I have had the privilege to be associated with several people in varied contexts. Every transaction has its own backdrop, flow, ripples, highs & lows ... finally to be absorbed into ...the same source!

Having experienced a wide range of opposites ... intense loneliness to fine friendship...daunting humiliation to graceful acknowledgement... moments of self doubt to glimpse of bliss... one can sense that it’s coming from and pointing to...the same source!

When Shakespeare said...To be or Not to Be.. perhaps he was pointing to...the same source!

... What’s always there!

Many years back, I got my first tri-cycle. The context, the conversations and the contentment that day, sit within vividly. In case I was to get a tri-cycle today, it is of little use. Many such experiences help me reflect on... What’s always there!

There are several events, pointers and signals that shape our thought & action. I distinctly remember an aunt visiting our place long back to talk about her father’s accident. Over the years, I have seen several layers of the saga. While we learn at every step, am keen to relate to... What’s always there!

At any cross section, we can be thrilled, delighted, disturbed, irritated by some action or reaction. It takes quite some effort to relate to and be with... What’s always there!

…. Poetic justice.

It’s human nature to search for the infinite in most dimensions. Be it our will, skill or effort, a certain notional ideal can be the driving force. This infinite reservoir can inspire us, make us perspire, while taking its own course for … Poetic justice.

Last year, during the trip to New Delhi, I was looking for a title at a bookstore. Literally, out of the blue, happened to see a little book – Letters to Sam by Daniel Gottlier – unrelated to what I was looking for. It’s a pleasure to see the way things shape up. Probably pointing to … Poetic justice.

Few moths back, a friend called up to say that he had a spare ticket to a concert for a famous classical singer. Having enjoyed his songs for many years, it was an opportunity not to miss. I was probably ready for this grand finale.. for .. Poetic justice.

This is to pay my respects to a professor who has been a significant figure in my life. While I was never his student, I have had the opportunity to interact with him at several stations and in varied contexts. He has been a guide, a friend, a fellow traveller at times. He has been gentle, frustrating and demanding on occasions. As I look back, he has a fine place within, pointing to …. Poetic justice.

... whatever surfaces!

Few years back, an astrologer was discussing her readings about my horoscope with me. It was a lively and intense experience. She did suggest that the Almighty does not subject us to a test, for which we are not prepared! Am sure this suggestion will gradually settle within and help me handle ... whatever surfaces!

Am sometimes reminded of a fine high school teacher. Even close to retirement, he used to say "Am becoming better & better, come what may, it does not matter". Am sure we have seen the picture of a frog, about to be swallowed, still trying to strangle its predator. The slogan reads "Never Ever Give Up".

Having come across hundreds of inspiring tales, narrations, events, one can see these waves reaching the shore, leaving some moisture behind and taking some sand away. In several relationships, dealings & associations, you gradually reach a steady state of mutual acceptance and empathy. Once this steady state is reached, you can handle...... whatever surfaces!

...dimensions of learning !

Sometimes the sight and plight of a close relation, friend, associate, even a pet and of course our own-self, can inspire us, grind us and uplift us. These are all ......dimensions of learning !

What catches my attention and inspires me, is actually not in my full control. An expression from Roosevelt "the only thing to fear is Fear" can influence the thought process at many levels. A fine narration of a character from centuries back, can find a seat within and gently guide many steps.

It's a pleasure to see the way several creative and gifted people, scholars ... in fact many many people have internalised and outgrown their limitations.

Few years back, I had gone to pick up our son from a friend's place. It was raining and wet allover. As I tried to rush towards the front of their door, I tripped on the way down. It was not a pleasant sight, but a good learning experience. As we know, there are many ...dimensions of learning !

... the Driver!

I have often enjoyed long drives, with music adding to the beauty of the passage. Was driving back from Newcastle to Sydney, few days back. Having driven many a time, over the years, by myself and also with family & friends, one is familiar with the passage. It's interesting to note that while many things change with time, perhaps, the one that does not change is the... the Driver!


Many learned ones have suggested to give up the idea of "doer-ship". It has been my effort to look after the safe passage of nears & dears. Am almost certain that am not ... the Driver!


There are moments, most deeply reflective and sensitive in nature, when I can say, I was with ... the Driver!


Long back, while driving along with our daughter, I would be eager to get to the work appointment. This fine teenage girl was relaxing with the music in slow traffic. This has been witnessed by ... the Driver!


Am pretty keen to handover everything totally to ... the Driver!

...Nothing !!

This is partly to share the impression left within by quite a few acquaintances that have left the planet. Would like to mention our neighbour Bernie, a senior colleague Brian.... many a relation.... At this cross section, there is feeling of fine closure and acceptance. You wish them Peace, remember them warmly and carry .... Nothing.

As a child grows, learns to walk, it gradually lets go of your hand. The pleasure you derive from seeing your near ones grow is phenomenal. You pray for their well-being & expect ...Nothing.

For a very long time, I have enjoyed the preparation of an eatery in Delhi. Having left the place long back, you cherish the memory, value their expertise, but wait for ... Nothing.

Gradually, in most associations, you are trying to reach an even platform, where you value the contact & time, but expect ....Nothing !!

...Unknown !!

Once you wake up after a sound sleep, you feel relaxed & refreshed. In deep sleep, however, what goes on and your whereabouts are essentially ...Unknown !!

With the best of intent, one can take careful steps for well-being of all concerned. I can do my best to provide some humour, comfort & company. The exact course of events remains largely... Unknown !!

I do enjoy the company of friends & relations. It's a pleasure to share a fine thought, piece of music, a good meal, a joke with your nears & dears. Having said that, one needs one's solitude, little space as ... Unknown !!

Over 20 years back, I was deeply concerned to see a little boy struggling helplessly, as he watched his gardener father trapped by a faulty electrical cable. Luckily it got sorted. While I understand part of my sympathy for the boy, it remains largely ....Unknown !!

The two tiny pets at home, add to the quality of life. The younger one is 11 years of age & scared of clouds. In unsettled weather, she will walk right behind you. Who is adding to whose sense of security & well being remains largely ... Unknown !!

Over the years, I have thoroughly enjoyed fair few movies. They make you laugh, cry, reflect & even decipher basic life patterns. Knowing fully well that you are just watching a drama, part of you resonates & merges with the character for reasons ...Unknown !!

Am sure after a point, I will be a lot more comfortable, once am better friends with & more accepting of the ...Unknown !!

... (extra) ordinary !

Several years back, I was having a bad toothache for a few days. On the way through a shopping arcade, I walked into a dental practice to seek advice. The dentist was nice enough to manage a few minutes to discuss and was able to offer helpful tips. Surprisingly, we later discovered that we have many interest and acquittance in common. The way this link came about was ... (extra) ordinary !

I have been going to this dentist for many years for regular check up. Just regular dealing .... ordinary !

Few years back, was thinking of a close classmate from decades back. Had no contact details. Out of the blue, I received an email from him, asking me if I still recognised him! Seems ... (extra) ordinary !

Gradually am trying to move past this distinction between ... ordinary and ... (extra) ordinary !

.... my C.G.

Objects around us have a centre of gravity, the C.G. For the circle, it's the centre itself, as it is for the square.

Each one of us has our own C.G. where our attention goes, almost involuntarily many a time. This C.G. is influenced by our desires, aspirations, concerns, longings...

It has been my practice to donate blood for many years. Many a time, as the needle is put through my vein, am reminded of the pain, our little son would have faced when he had to be placed on a drip some 23 years back. It is part of .... my C.G.

Having felt the need for it, I have invested a lot of time & energy to nurture & sustain a range of associations. Am grateful for the friendly feel. It's pretty close to .... my C.G.

Given that we often get to appreciate bright stars on a dark night, it's my effort to weigh and balance my own strengths & weaknesses, assets & liabilities, essentially to stay focussed and remain connected to .... my C.G.

... art of enjoyment!

For some 3 decades, I do enjoy a cup of coffee. It's an acquired taste from uni days. Over the years, you figure out, what's a good coffee for you. I do try to reflect, where is enjoyment - is it in anticipation, or in the slow sip, or in the after-taste ! Hopefully it will help me decipher the ... art of enjoyment!

Music has found a seat within for decades. So many songs help you relate to your own roots, understand human relations, reflect on finer points and appreciate the creative artists
Had the fortune of attending the performance of a Gazaal master recently, having enjoyed his music for over 25 years.
It's pretty simple to understand that we all have our own liking for a particular type of music. It varies from person to person and with time
As Gulzar Sahib says - music fills our life. It helps me understand the ... art of enjoyment!

It seems Aristotle was asked how long should the legs be! As we understand, his reply was "long enough to reach the ground!" A certain degree of "grounded" feeling or self acceptance is part of the ... art of enjoyment!

... as it is !

Some 35 years back, I had just joined the hostel at uni. Ragging till late night by seniors was common. One night, I happened to be back to my room at a reasonable time & simply fell asleep. Some time later, when the room-mate returned and knocked at the door, there was no response from me. After repeated knocks and no response, quite a few hostlers gathered & decided to push open the door! Just as the door was being forced open, I woke up totally surprised ! Over the years, I have figured out, one may or may not get such a sound sleep every time. Am almost able to accept it... as it is!

Having walked with friends & relations over many miles, one can see that we all have our own journey. Even with the best of intent, I need not labour my point of view. I can accept it... as it is!

There is a tree in our street that has its bark peeling off, given its age. It still has a fine presence for me. I accept it... as it is!

Nearly 25 years back, 'had gone out for a weekend get-together with few friends from the industrial unit, where I was a trainee. It was a lively, relaxed, fun session. There was a soothing classical song, pretty popular at that time - that was played 30 times during the evening ! Over the years, I have figured out, each meeting need not be the same. Am able to accept it... as it is!

It's an earnest effort to gradually be in a frame, whereby, am comfortably accepting most of the events, interactions, developments.... as it is!

One of the most fundamental concepts am trying to internalise is that of "surrender". The best I can describe, it is our effortless internal acceptance of Life force, ultimately our own Self... as it is !

With warm good wishes & season's greetings

....surface tension !

As per Physics, water has surface tension. This explains how a tiny pin can float on surface of water, how water rises in a small capillary, how bubbles are formed. Am getting the impression that surface tension is a common phenomenon all around us!


Long back, as a small kid, while watching a movie, I was pretty upset & tense to see the hero being bashed up on the screen. In fact I walked up to my Dad, to seek comfort from this tense situation. In hindsight, I can label the whole episode as superficial, just a tense scene on surface ....surface tension !


Wherever we are in touch with others, in social and business setting, for a collective goal, there will be scope for cooperation, competition, comfort, even conflict.... surface tension !


With practice, hopefully we get to the stage, where we can exist peacefully, like a river, in-spite of.... surface tension !

...form of meditation!

In line with our nature and nurture, we all have our own preferred way to seek "happiness", find and enjoy ourselves. This is an attempt to describe few ways that work for me.
Having enjoyed, reflected on, thrilled by and floated with hundreds of songs over many years, one form of meditation for me is ...music

Having attended several discourses, workshops, retreats about personal & spiritual development, one can add that company of learned ones, as also discussion with fellow travellers help immensely.

There are several moments, that are so complete that time seems to stop at least for a moment This could be a leisurely talk with an acquaintance,, a gentle walk with a pet, explaining a concept to a class, finding a way out of a problematic situation or just being "aware" of an issue of concern!

Am gradually finding that comedy is serious business! It's always fulfilling to share a joke, a cup of coffee, watch a movie with family & friends.

To me, writing & sharing these notes is also a ...form of meditation!

... just one sentence !

The story goes that a well established king asked a noted scholar for a selection of books that one must read. An year later, as promised, the scholar presented the king with a row of camels, loaded with books that must be read! The king was furious. The poor scholar had to plead for a week's time to do better that this. A week later, the king was really agitated to find a camel loaded with books. The frightened scholar was given just one day to pull it together. Next day the king was presented with a golden plate with a note " There were people, they were born and they died!" ... just one sentence !

As I was leaving home to join uni in 76, my Grandfather asked me to take down a sentence for guidance :[translation] one who fights the storms, is a good Human Being, one who fights the intent, is the Real Being ! Over the years, I have reflected on this ... just one sentence !

My Grandmother gave me a picture of her chosen deity, saying "He will protect you" ...just one sentence !

It's fascinating to see how much can be conveyed and retained through... just one sentence !

...the shifting ground!

Over four decades back, I picked up a few laminations from a discarded lot, on the way back from the primary school. It was a treasured lot for play. A close family friend, 'stole' some of these. I was really upset, even more concerned that my folks continued to be friends with "their" family. Gradually, the whole episode appears so insignificant and kid stuff ! I can see ... the shifting ground!

Nearly two decades back, we moved overseas. What was the foundation and identity for decades, the place of childhood, youth, marriage, birth of kids, the parental "home" continued to have massive pull within for long. After a while the parental family also migrated. Happened to visit the place few months back. While I have vivid memory of many miles, I can see ... the shifting ground!

Sitting in the train, on the way to/from work, sometimes I doze off. Few stations pass by, without noticing ...the shifting ground!

Gradually, am trying to figure out, what stays with you, despite ...the shifting ground!